the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize