Say something about gay babies.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize