You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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