Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize