finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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