We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
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Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We have so much sex to catch up on
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My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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