Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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