Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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