found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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