I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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