Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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