I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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