I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize