the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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