i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
And then my night got REAL pukey
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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