Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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