I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My ATM looks so different sober.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
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