Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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