Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize