i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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