The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
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I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
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Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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