I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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