they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
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When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
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By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
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