So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize