They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
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Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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