it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
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She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
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hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize