So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Randomize