Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
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