I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize