TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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