I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize