I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
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He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
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having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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