Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize