can we get nightvision for the apartment?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize