he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize