when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize