i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
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DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
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I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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