i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
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Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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