im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where does the pee come out of this thing
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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