Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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