Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
me + whiskey = a bad person
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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