she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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