My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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