my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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