how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize