Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize