I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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