I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize