I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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