You just made me feel so damn special
it hurts more in the daytime
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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